So I was having a dinner night with the girls, where we were talking about dating and relationships, and letting things go (or people, whatevs). We thought about how easier it was to let someone you’ve been seeing go when they do blatant things to show they’re probably not right for you, or that they are clearly from the clan of idiocy. (See 8 Men to Avoid)
But, what about the times when someone hasn’t done anything outrightly “wrong”? No one has cheated, there hasn’t been a forward display of disrespect, and they’re actually good people.
What do you do when something inside you questions whether this is right?, (even though if you’re contemplating it, 8 times out of 10 you already know the answer).
Why is it so hard to let people go without a concrete, outward act of stupidity?
You know the feeling. You’re seeing someone, and they’re not half bad. In fact, they’re pretty nice, and really good on paper, and all around a good “catch”. Yet, we wait and we wait for them to mess up, when we already know inside that this person isn’t what we’re looking for. So, why can’t we just listen to ourselves and trust that WE know what is best for us!
Well I’ve put some thought into this, since I certainly have been guilty of this, as we’re all human.
I’ve realized, letting go of someone who is “fine enough”, presents the fear that we won’t find it again. Lord knows, the good ones are far and few between the a-holes, so when you finally meet one who doesn’t make you want to change your number or block them from Facebook, you hope it will work, because otherwise that would mean you have 3 more crazies before you find a good one again.
Ain’t nobody got time fo’ dat!
Or there’s the “What if I’m wrong?” thought. I know that’s what goes through my head. When there’s blatant reasons, making decisions becomes much easier. But when there isn’t, it takes a whole lotta courage to end something that is going “well enough”.
All I know is, if we’re going to walk around dissecting when men “aren’t that into us” and when we should walk away, then we should probably be honest with ourselves when we’re just not that into them. Of course this is considering you’re looking for something real. Because if you’re just looking for casual dating, then this won’t matter.
But if you’re looking for something real, Mediocre, and okay on paper is not good enough.
That is what we really don’t have time for. Nobody has time to be with someone who doesn’t make our toes curl with just their touch.
Having the courage to trust yourself, and trust you know what you’re looking for (and this can be with lots of things), is so uplifting and freeing! Free yourself up from anything that doesn’t take your breathe away, or gets your adrenaline pumping. Don’t wait for them to mess up to use it as an excuse to let it go.
Just Let.It.Go. And keep looking for what you want. Cuz if you want it, you deserve it!
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